It's the end of week 5 of Winter Term and I'm visibly stressed. I have this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach and I constantly find myself with a lump in my throat over the silliest things.
I'm really trying hard to stay on top of all the stuff I need to do, but I'm falling behind in homework. The weekends are really the only chance that I get to work on school, but by that time I'm so stressed that all I want to do is relax a little. So I usually do it, then I start feeling guilty for not staying on the grind.
I know I need to manage my time a little better and maybe look into quick methods of relaxation during the week. I hate the way stress fills your entire body so that every little thing that happens in your life adds to the huge amount of weight on your shoulders.
Things that usually wouldn't bother me are making me want to cry lately. I'm trying to stay positive and energetic, but I'm finding myself without any motivation more and more. I wish, again, that there was some quick cure for stressful situations.
I'm not going to lie- part of it is definitely Corvallis. It isn't home for me. It's hard to describe..but after a long, exhausting day you just want to go home and relax...Corvallis isn't it for me. I don't go home and relax until the weekend, when I drive to Portland. Sometimes I can literally feel the stress falling away as I blast down I5.
Sometimes I'm beyond that, like this weekend.
I've made a decision, last weekend, that I really think is fundamental to both my well being and my experience/education. I'm going to transfer to PSU after Spring Term. Mainly because I feel I've gotten a lot of experience from Student Media at OSU and it's time to focus on internships, which are all in Portland. It just makes sense to go to school there.
That and what I mentioned before...Portland is my home. I love it. I constantly miss it. If I'm honest with myself, I'm really not very happy in Corvallis. I think it's the best decision for me.
Well...anyways..now that I've whined and bitched about my life (it's probably getting pretty tiring for some of you and I apologize for that) it's time to focus on school, then pick up my best friend from the bus station tonight and focus on relaxing.
Half way through...we can all make it!
I hope that you're able to find the stress relief that you need. PSU seems like a very good fit for your passions, and I'm sure Mouse will be a very happy camper that you'll be closer all the time. Whining is what blogs are for! :D Don't let the stress and pressures of life/school bring you down, whenever you get stressed out - breathe, and remember that you're doing the best you can, and as long as you do that, there's no reason to worry about things out of your control.
ReplyDeleteUgh. Stress sucks.
ReplyDeleteIs every second of your day scheduled with something important that you just can't do any other time?
Making big decisions about your education, it means you are taking it seriously!
(oh and detrimental means harmful. I hope the move won't be detrimental ! Maybe instrumental? Successful! something positive :)
@Stephanie Thanks, I really appreciate it!! I'm really excited that I'll be in Portland full time again : )
ReplyDelete@Nothing Fancy lol, I know what detrimental means....I totally didn't mean that haha. Thanks for catching it!! : )